Gen Xers in their 40s and 50s share the unexpected pleasures of being child-free

Choosing not to have kids is becoming more common than ever. In fact, it's a choice that nearly half of Americans are making. According to a 2024 Pew Research Center study, 47% of Americans under 50 do not have children–an increase from 37% in 2018.

Of course, there are pros and cons to having a family. But when it comes to happiness, a 2023 study found that people who choose to not have kids are just as happy at age 70 as those with kids.

If you're contemplating a decision to forgo or start a family, it can be comforting to hear from others about their experience–especially positive ones. To help you feel more confident about your decision, these are 22 of the most interesting responses to the question, "People in their 40s and 50s with no children, how does it feel?"

1. "I wish I had the means to have children and a home to give them a good life in… but I’m managing fine alone… I found having a dog is fulfilling enough." – Eternal-strugal

2. "Broke the cycle of intergenerational trauma, so that's a win. I live in solitude mostly, and it's lovely. I have a rich inner life." –Tempus Fuggit

3. "I just turned 40. My wife and I had the kids discussion 15yrs ago and we’re extremely happy we didn’t have any. We travel, sleep in, bought a house, have savings and plenty of hobbies. Absolutely love life without them." – Just_Movie8555

4. "Feels like freedom. Financial freedom, freedom to do what I want with my time." – notquitenerds

5. "Can confirm. It feels like going on relaxing vacations w/ my hubby 3x/year, buying what I feel like and not having to save any $ for college funds and weddings. We’re happy DINKs (double income no kids)." – shannick1

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6. "Like I saved a soul from the harshness of life." – ChosenFouled

7. "It's fantastic. Disposable income, travel, sleeping in, splurge on luxuries. What's not to like?" – Proud__Apostate

8. "No teenagers wanting to borrow your car (or no taxi service for those too young to drive), no obnoxious music, no toys and other messes around the house, no bickering and fighting, no diapers to change in the middle of the night...? Wow that sure is boring. I mean what am I supposed to do with all this money I've been saving for years child-free? Spend it on fun stuff for myself? Gee whiz." – cinnafury03

9. "Never felt a burning desire to be a parent, kept waiting for my feelings to change but they never did. I always felt if you wanted kids it should be a desire that burns in your soul—not something you should do because it’s expected from others or you are “at that age”. I’m not a kid hater, kids are great I just don’t want to be a parent. Anyway, married 22 years (together nearly 30) and happy with our lives. Finances are good and have a bit more freedom than our friends with kids. A nice family is a great thing and something to be very proud of because man it is a lot of work. Don’t know if you’ll find the answers you’re looking for on the internet… talk to your partner because ultimately they will be the only other one that matters in the decision. Health and happiness to you internet stranger." – camaraoGB

10. "It feels like it was the right choice for me." – indee19

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11. "I have not enough money to have raised children. And even less maternal instinct. Zero regrets." – Wet_Techie

12. "Being in my 50s with no children feels wonderful. I have a fulfilling life that isn’t consumed by work or defined solely by my career. Without children, I didn’t have the natural push to grow up quickly, so learning how to be a responsible adult took a bit longer. It’s also easy to fall into the trap of being self-absorbed without kids to anchor you, so I’ve made it a priority to stay mindful of that. In my 30s and 40s, it was harder to make friends since most people my age were busy raising children. But now, in my 50s, many of their kids are in or nearing college, and people my age are socializing like adults again, not just play dates and kids sports games. I’m married now, but when I was single, the holiday season could feel lonely without the built-in action of children or family obligations. Life is full of tradeoffs. I didn’t experience the challenges of raising children, but I also didn’t feel the unique love and connection that comes with having an offspring. Still, I don’t regret my decision—it was the right one for me. I have a wonderful, middle-class American life, and I’m deeply grateful for how fortunate I am. There’s beauty in embracing the life you’ve chosen and finding fulfillment in its unique rhythm." – spb1990gvhs

13. "Wife and I retired this year at 40. Spent a month in Iceland for the holidays. No regrets passing on kids for us." –Local_Database_4159

14. "It’s like heaven on earth, we do whatever we want whenever we want. Never thought life would be this carefree and wonderful. It’s just constantly setting up the next vacation and restaurant reservation." – Marsupialize

15. "It feels like what freedom should feel like. It’s clean & quiet. The toilet is flushed. Nothing is sticky. No furniture is destroyed. There’s no crayon or nail polish drawings on the walls. There’s no sh*t on the floor anywhere. I walked from the main bath to my room naked. I don’t have to lock bathroom doors or hide food from anybody so there’s an ounce left for me in the morning. Aaaaaaaaand then I come to out of my fantasy and want to run my effing head through a window. If you’re free, stay free!!!!!!" –IntendedHero

16. "No regrets here, but I have a niece and nephew I’m very close to. The anxiety I have dealing with them reminds me that it would be 100x worse if they were my actual child….. I’m fucked up enough for everyone so no need to reproduce that!" – ImAShrub

17. "I’m 47 and it feels amazing. My husband and I don’t stress or worry about anything. We have financial freedom. We can come/ go as we please, travel whenever we want to , and sleep in late whenever we want to. No regrets about be child free at all. We live a full and happy life without kids." – RainbowUnicornBaby45

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18. "I wanted them, nature didn’t cooperate. I tried for 10 years. But at 42, I’m finding positives everywhere. I can travel and spend more time with my young adult nieces/nephews and really be a part of their lives. We entertain friends a lot. It’s nice." – Remarkable_Story9843

19. "It feels wonderful honestly. I took in a foster son a year and a half ago and I’m so glad I was in a position to do so. It helped heal my heart from wanting to give birth. I always planned to have children but I ended up with someone toxic and by the time my partner passed when I was 30 I decided children probably weren’t in the cards. So while some days I’m sad, I also use that mother energy I have for my patients. And they love it." – NeitherMaybeBoth

20. "Feels amazing. Feels like sleeping in, ice cream for dinner sometimes, earning a masters degree by cash rolling it, owning a house, owning 4 cars (Tacoma, Wrangler, Miata, and XJ Cherokee), owning two dogs, landscaping the hell out of my yard, and exploring fun hobbies." – ZenPothos

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21. "42M and Single. Feels great. I have 4 nieces I adore. Additionally, I'm basically a bonus uncle to all of my best bros kids. Life is fantastic." – midtownkcc

22. "Like sleep. It feels like sleep." – titikerry