What would we do without our neighbors? “A commitment to knowing our neighbors can help us feel more connected—and may allow us to experiment with the feeling of being known,” writes Julie Beck and Becca Rashid in the intro to their podcast, “How to Talk to People.” On the episode “How to Know Your Neighbors,” they interview Pete Davis, author of “Dedicated: The Case for Commitment in an Age of Infinite Browsing.” On the topic of neighbors—and the importance of getting to know them in an actual, real way—he says, “Bring back picnics, and people doing dinner parties. The amount of people that say they have no friends—you know, in 1990, that was only 3% of Americans. In 2021, it was 12%. And so we do have numbers that show we’re in a neighboring crisis.”
One way to combat that, is by looking out for those who live near and next to you. By treating your neighbors like family (which, in a way, they are: “There’s a weird intimacy that we do have with our neighbors, like he can hear what you’re playing through the walls. You share a wall,” reminds Beck on the podcast), you’re taking a step towards a more connected, flourishing neighborhood. I remember growing up, whenever we’d go on vacation, we’d ask our nextdoor neighbors to collect the mail for us. The rationale is somewhat hazy—was it so the mail didn’t build up in the mailbox and get overstuffed? Was it to prevent potential robbers from noticing we weren’t home for days at a time?—but all I know is that when we came home, they had our mail waiting for us, and my parents would have so much fun chatting at the curb about the places they’d been. The same would happen whenever they went away, too. We’d drive each other to the airport, exchange Christmas gifts. I felt more than safe in my neighborhood, but seen and cared for.
“Test, test. Small steps”
For Caroline Beckham, neighborly love was definitely felt when she found a heartwarming handwritten note on her car door one morning. The 23-year-old post-grad shared a video on her TikTok with the caption, “yall 😭” and onscreen text, “POV: Your elderly neighbor is concerned about you driving in the snow.”
The note reads:
“This is ICE not snow. Little gas and pump breaks. Brakes, let off. Use let off. Test — test. Small steps.”
The note almost seems like a poem or haiku, containing very few words and short, staccato sentences, like “test, test. Small steps.” But the message is clear: be extremely careful while driving in the winter. The video is geotagged in Texas, and this past winter, the Lone Star experienced a severe winter storm. An Arctic blast brought historic snowfall and record-breaking low temperatures to South-Central Texas, West Texas, and the Coastal Plains, which led to icy roads and several vehicle accidents, especially in the Austin area.
Brrrr....Giphy
For Caroline, not only was this message from her “elderly neighbor” sweet, it could also be the advice standing between her and a potentially devastating car crash. According to the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA), the snowfall in Austin that occurred in January 2025 was the first the city had seen since 2022. Meaning, that in some parts of the state, residents weren’t used to driving in such hostile conditions. And Caroline’s neighbor was spot-on: the most important safety tips to remember while driving on an icy road are:
- Reduce your speed
- Go easy on your breaks
On the website Icy Road Safety, they advise “you should never be driving faster than 45mph in any vehicle when roads are icy—not even on highways! High speeds make it both easy to lose control and difficult to stop. You do not have the skills to drive at normal speeds on icy roads.”
They continue, “Brake application is a common trigger of slides that result in a loss of vehicle control. ABS (antilock brakes) do not work well on ice and snow, and often will lock up your wheels regardless. Sliding wheels are uncontrollable; steering input will not change the vehicle’s direction if the wheels are sliding.” The more you know!
God bless this neighbor
This video, which has 4.1 million views on TikTok, has stuck a chord online. This seemingly simple act—leaving a note for a neighbor—reminds us that we’re never truly ever alone… and even the smallest gesture of kindness can leave a profound impact. Commenters are loving Caroline’s video and the note her elderly neighbor left her:
“He risked his life walking on that ice to make sure you didn’t risk yours driving on it, how freaking sweet! Protect that man at all costs!” wrote one person.
“Please bake him something 😭😭😭” begged another. And “Please go reassure him you were safe please 😭”
Other comments included:
“Well he thought you needed a Dad that day & just stepped right up. ❤️We love him!”
“if you'll excuse me I'll need to go and ugly cry now…”
We're fine, we swear...Giphy
“i saw my older neighbor walk past my window with his lil ice scrapper and was so confused, i go outside to leave for work and he was cleaning my car off😭😭bc he knows i always leave at the same time and it had just snowed 😭😭😭”
And finally, “Bless his soul. He seems like such a kind man to worry about you ❤️”
There’s no such thing as the “perfect” neighbor, but this man gets pretty darn close. Are there people in your neighborhood you’ve been meaning to introduce yourself to? Maybe today’s that day.
J. R. R. Tolkien in the 1920s
J.R.R Tolkien during his time in the British Army (1915-1920)
