This mom thought her seat swap idea was genius, the internet thought it was audacity

Sometimes, traveling with young kids requires a little grace from fellow passengers. But not everyone is eager to offer it, especially at 30,000 feet.

One mom-to-be found herself caught in this tension when she asked the internet whether it was fair to ask other passengers to move so she could sit with her toddler. The answers she received were eye-opening, if not a little harsh.

A familiar parenting challenge with a twist

In a now-viral post on Mumsnet, user Deekaytwo, who was five months pregnant then, explained her travel dilemma ahead of a four-hour flight. She and her partner had secured seats 7A and 7C, with the middle seat between them blocked—something they often do to give their almost 2-year-old son a bit of space during the flight.

Representative Image: Kids have to travel too, but maybe book their seat next to your own. Pexels | Oleksandr P

“We always use it for our nearly 2-year-old son after take-off and before landing,” she wrote, adding that they usually book the front-row seats but missed out this time.

According to the seat map, two seats in the front row—1C and 1F—were showing as empty, likely reserved for gold-tier members. Eyeing those seats, Deekaytwo wondered if she could move her family up and ask one of the passengers already seated in 1A or 1D to switch with them.

“Am I being unreasonable to move us to the empty seats in the front row and hope/expect 1A or 1D to move so we can sit together?” she asked. “They’d still have their aisle/window and avoid sitting next to a baby, so I think it’s a win-win.”

"They’d avoid sitting next to a baby, so I think it’s a win-win."

— Deekaytwo

To help gauge the fairness of her request, she offered up two options to fellow forum users: stick with the current seats and “let the fancy gold members keep the empty seat next to them,” or make the case for a swap, hoping it wouldn’t inconvenience anyone and might benefit everyone.

The plan looked good on paper, or screen, but in reality it didn't quite shake out. Mumsnet | Deekaytwo

The internet had opinions—lots of them

The replies came in fast—over 200 of them. And most people felt pretty strongly that, yes, she was being unreasonable.

"No, you cannot expect someone to move for your convenience."

— BreakfastAtMimis

“Book seats that work for you and assume that any that are already booked will remain occupied by someone else,” wrote BreakfastAtMimis.

“Only book it if you're prepared to travel in the seats you've booked!” added ThanKyoualMee. “I wouldn’t book on the provision you need someone to swap with you.”

"Only book it if you're prepared to travel in the seats you've booked!"

— ThanKyoualMee

Another user, HoHoHoliday, kept it simple: “It’s only a four-hour flight—you should be able to manage your own child for that time.”

"You should be able to manage your own child for that time."

— HoHoHoliday

Some empathy, but clear boundaries

Not all responses were harsh. A few commenters empathized with her situation—traveling pregnant with a toddler is no picnic. But they still emphasized the same thing: no one owes you a seat swap, no matter how good your reason may be.

While many parents have relied on the kindness of strangers when traveling, the general vibe was that it shouldn’t be assumed, especially when it puts someone else in an uncomfortable spot.

Still, it's easy to see where Deekaytwo was coming from. She wasn’t demanding a change, but wondering aloud if it would be a problem to ask.

Plan ahead, but hope for kindness

Flying with kids is hard. Flying pregnant is harder. Doing both at once? A logistical headache. This story is a gentle reminder that while parents deserve compassion, fellow passengers aren’t obligated to rearrange their travel to accommodate last-minute changes, and when you make plans, make plans you can live with.

When it comes to seat swaps, a little empathy on all sides can go a long way—but expecting it can be a bumpy ride.