Skip to content
Search

Latest Stories

Does this sound familiar?

You have a super important deadline coming up at work… but you put it off until the very last minute. You promised your girlfriend that this time, you’d plan the vacation… but surely, that can wait until tomorrow, right? Oh, and it’s about time to renew your passport… but watching “Modern Family” for the billionth time sounds so much nicer right now.


Procrastination happens to the best of us. But why do our brains work like this?


Think Which One GIFGiphy


We all put tasks off, but according to the American Psychological Association, one out of five people in the United States—20% of the population—is a “chronic” procrastinator. These people prefer to wait, and as a result, end up delaying all aspects of their life: at home, work, and school, and in relationships. While non-procratinators focus on the task at hand (these people also tend to have a stronger personal identity and are less wrapped up in “social esteem,” or what others think of us), procrastinators habitually put off everything, and usually have some handy "excuse" as to why they can't right now. Which may sound a bit harsh. As Dr. Joseph Ferrari (a professor of psychology at DePaul University and a leading international researcher in the study of procrastination) makes clear, chronic procrastination often manifests itself with other personality challenges such as ADHD, passive-aggressive tendencies, and obsessive-compulsive disorder.

But you don’t have to struggle with procrastination forever. On the Reddit forum r/getdisciplined (a self-motivation forum), user @Sad_Satisfaction1550 learned this exact, very powerful lesson, writing, “for years, I thought the only way to get myself to do anything was through guilt and self-criticism. If I didn’t bully myself into working, cleaning, or exercising, nothing would happen. It was always some variable of: ‘If I don’t XYZ, I’m a failure and will feel horrible.'”

However, everything changed after a meeting with their therapist.

“She told me,” the user continues, “Instead of avoiding feeling bad, why not chase feeling good?”


Keanu Reeves GIFGiphy


Just that one simple phrase, “instead of feeling bad, why not chase feeling good?” unlocked user @Sad_Satisfaction1550’s entire world, like Neo taking the red pill and learning the truth about the Matrix. Suddenly, nothing was the same anymore. They were able to reframe things and situations that would have thwarted them previously. “Instead of saying, ‘I have to work out or I’ll feel gross,’ I now say, ‘moving my body makes me feel energized and strong,’” they write. “[Or,] instead of ‘If I don’t finish this project. I’ll hate myself,’ it [becomes], ‘Working on this aligns with the life I want to build.’”

Could it really be that easy? The original poster acknowledges that this might come off silly, writing, “It sounds stupidly simple, but reframing my thoughts this way has made everything so much easier to start. No more guilt-driven productivity spirals. Just me, doing things because they make my life better, not because I’m trying to escape self-hatred.”

If you’re still having trouble wrapping your head around this idea, don’t worry. Here are a few extra tips and tricks from user @Sad_Satisfaction1550 on Reddit, along with some related book recommendations, courtesy of their therapist.


Cat Working GIFGiphy


How to opt out of the self-criticism loop

  1. Your brain is wired for threat detection, not happiness. “Evolutionarily, we’re built to avoid danger, which is why negative self-talk can feel more ‘natural,’” they write. “But happiness? Fulfillment? You have to consciously train yourself to prioritize them.” Realizing and accepting this fact can be an essential step towards breaking your habitual procrastination. According to the Center for Courageous Living, our amygdala (the part of the brain known as the “threat detector”) is constantly scanning our surroundings, and asking "Is it safe?" The amygdala is one of the most ancient and primitive parts of the brain, and stays hypervigilant in case we need to be alerted of danger. But while this basic survival mechanism was certainly helpful in prehistoric times, in today’s world, an overactive amygdala can “hijack” our brain and cause us to spring into action before “we’re even aware of what’s going on.”
  2. Dopamine isn’t just about pleasure—it’s about motivation. While you probably associate dopamine with happiness (it is called “the happy hormone," after all), the little neurotransmitter is a lot more complicated than that. Whenever you do something enjoyable or beneficial, your brain releases dopamine, essentially sending a message to the body: “Whoa, that was awesome. Let’s bookmark it and do it again.” By regulating motor control and executive function, dopamine becomes a natural motivator, and gets you off your butt and moving in the right direction. “When your brain sees a task as a way to escape pain, it releases less dopamine,” writes user @Sad_Satisfaction1550. “But when you associate it with something rewarding, dopamine spikes, making it easier to act. That’s why shifting from ‘avoid bad’ to ‘chase good’ works so well."
  3. Your thoughts are not orders. Just because you think something, doesn’t make it true. Like, you probably thought the Dallas Mavericks would never trade their star player, Luka Dončić. And we all know how that ended. Similarly, being cruel to ourselves is almost never a reflection of reality. “Just because your brain tells you ‘I suck,’ doesn’t make it true,” the Reddit user reminds. “I started treating negative self-talk like spam emails—acknowledge, then delete."


Read Harley Quinn GIFGiphy


Additional reading

Still not satisfied? It may be time to hit the books. “My therapist also threw a bunch of book recs at me, and honestly, reading these changed everything,” says @Sad_Satisfaction1550 on Reddit.

  1. The Expectation Effect: How Your Mindset Can Change Your World” by David Robinson. — “This book will make you question everything you think you know about your brain. It’s about how our expectations literally shape our reality—and how believing something is hard makes it harder and how shifting your mindset can rewire your experiences. Insanely good read.”
  2. Stolen Focus: Why You Can’t Pay Attention—and How to Think Deeply Again” by Johann Hari. — “If you’ve ever felt like your brain is turning to mush from scrolling, this book explains why. It dives deep into how modern life is rewiring our ability to focus and how to reclaim our attention. This book actually got me to change my habits.”
  3. The Mindful Athlete: Secrets to Pure Performance” by George Mumford. — “Ever wonder how elite athletes stay mentally sharp? This book breaks down how mindfulness can help you perform better under pressure, whether you’re playing sports or just trying to get through Monday. The practical techniques in here are gold.”
  4. No Hard Feelings: The Secret Power of Embracing Emotions at Work” by Liz Fosslien and Mollie West Duffy. — “If you’ve ever been told to “just be rational,” this book will blow your mind. It’s all about how emotions aren’t the enemy of logic but actually fuel better decision-making, productivity, and creativity. Super fun, easy read.”
  5. Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle” by Emily Nagosaki and Amelia Nagosaki. — “This book helped me understand why stress isn’t just about work but about how we complete the ‘stress cycle.’ It’s packed with actionable tips on how to actually finish stress so it doesn’t eat you alive. Life-changing stuff.”

For this Reddit user, therapy became more than just a safe space to talk about their feelings. It gave them a tool for getting out of the “self-criticism mode”—and into life. So, what tasks are you putting off? And could there be a way to think about them differently?

More For You

screenshots of a little girl in the hospital; little girl dancing with her father

Ava Cooper and her dad Sean celebrate a surprise daddy-daughter dance at Cleveland Clinic Children's.

Cleveland Clinic/Instagram

Hospital surprises 10-year-old waiting for heart transplant with her own father-daughter dance

One of the highlights for young girls in elementary school is the annual father-daughter dance. Not only is it an opportunity to get dressed up and get grooving, it's a special time for daughters to be celebrated by their dads and make new memories together. And for 10-year-old Ava Cooper, who has been in the hospital for more than 200 days awaiting a heart transplant, her mom Jamie and Cleveland Clinic Children's made sure she didn't miss out on the special occasion with her dad, Sean. They put together a surprise daddy-daughter dance in the hospital just for them, and the emotional video was shared on Instagram.

"There wasn’t a dry eye in the room, when 10-year-old Ava Cooper and her dad, Sean, danced forehead to forehead during an unforgettable father-daughter dance. Ava says, 'My dad is like having the best friend a girl could ask for'," the post's caption reads.

Keep ReadingShow less
A man covered in the circles his wife drew on his skin, calling attention to his moles.

It might seem like an odd idea, but this trick has a real shot to save lives.

TikTok | @brinleemiles

Husband goes to dermatologist covered in circles—his wife’s intuition may have saved his life

Brinlee Miles wasn’t about to leave anything to chance. The 20-year-old from Utah knew her husband, Ryan Miles, needed a thorough checkup at the dermatologist, especially given his family history with skin cancer. Concerned about a few moles on his back and chest, she took matters into her own hands—literally—by grabbing a pen and circling the spots she thought needed attention.

To her surprise, the dermatologist not only acknowledged her efforts but responded in kind, marking the moles with notes after examining them.

Keep ReadingShow less
waking middle of night, awake, can't sleep
man in black jacket lying on bed
Photo by Tim Durgan on Unsplash

People share their fool-proof tricks to fall back asleep after waking up in the middle of the night

Few things are worse than finding yourself wide awake in the middle of the night, also called nocturnal awakening or early morning awakening, according to the Sleep Foundation. But if you do, you're not alone–millions of Americans struggle to stay asleep through the entire night. One study found that 35.5% of adults reported waking up in the middle of the night at least 3 nights per week.

Finding yourself awake at 3 a.m. can you leave you desperate for anything to work to fall back asleep. Thankfully, real people are sharing exactly what has worked for them. Here are 21 of the most helpful tips and tricks to the question, "Waking up in the middle of the night and can’t get back to sleep–what actually works?"

Keep ReadingShow less
thinking, brain trick, regulate emotions
man holding his head while sitting on chair near computer desk
Photo by Jason Strull on Unsplash

Neuroscientist shares simple brain trick successful people use to tackle hard things 'almost effortlessly'

Regulating emotions can be a challenge for nearly every human. Struggling with emotional baggage or problems can prevent you from accomplishing your goals, tasks, or dreams–personal or professional. To help you overcome emotions that may be weighing you down, neuroscientist and psychologist Ethan Kross, PhD, has a simple tool that can help you called WOOP. It's a tool inspired by the work of psychologist Gabriele Oettingen.

Dr. Kross has studied how the brain regulates emotions for more than 25 years, and has helped highly successful people (from CEOs to Navy SEALs) tackle hard things and accomplish their goals. WOOP has been studied to have a number of incredible benefits for adults, including reducing stress and engagement at work, improving time management, weight loss, and more. He lays out below what WOOP stands for:

Keep ReadingShow less
man sleeping with hat on face

Paradoxically, sleep is necessary for staying up longer

Photo by Jon Robinson on Unsplash

Veterans reveal the military hack that can help you stay awake longer in four easy steps

For those serving in the military, time is of the essence. Small things, like an effectively timed nap or an efficient, minutes-saving body temperature technique can mean the difference between life or death when you’re out in the field.

And while many civilians will, fortunately, never find themselves in such extreme circumstances, there is so much we can learn from the military and its ruthless efficiency. Because whether it’s taking a power nap or falling asleep in exactly two minutes, not only are the military’s tactics the most productive way to do things, they’re also usually the most safe.

Keep ReadingShow less